Jen’s Blog

We kicked off our weekend with our Friday night softball “double header.”  After sneaking out of work a few minutes early and speeding over for my first game through the stupid Battle Creek construction, the other team didn’t show up.  So we “won” our first game and then proceeded to get mercy ruled in the next game in 3.5 innings.  My favorite part of that embarrassment was the ump who was obviously rooting for the other team.  And for what?  They were totally kicking our ass and he felt he needed to make calls in their favor anyways.  I especially enjoyed when Pete got so mad that he started shaking the fence by the dugout and knocked all our bats down.   We at least had a good showing at the bar after the game! 

Saturday we got to watch an awesome Tiger’s game.  It was a great night (despite the downpour in the 9th inning) and an exciting ending…down to the bottom of the 9th!!! 

Is anyone else annoyed with the various fruity beers that are coming on the market?  What part of don’t fruit the beer (from the Man Laws) do you not understand.  First Miller Chill (gay), then Bud Light Lime (why did Bud Light sell out?), now fruit-infused beer by Michelob Ultra?  Raspberry pomegranite, are you frickin kidding me?  If you want to drink some pussy drink, go get a Sex on the Beach or have a wine cooler.  Don’t ruin beer. 

This past weekend, we went down to Coldwater for Pete’s cousin’s wedding reception.  We got a room at the hotel expecting fun and dancing.  By about 8pm it was painfully obvious that there would be no fun and dancing.  Soooo, we went driving down the road and randomly found a bar to hang out at.  Nobody was there when we arrived (at 10pm!), but an hour later it was bumping!!!  And when I say bumping, I mean women hanging on the railing to dry hump their dance partners kind of bumping.  It reminded me of the fun dancing in college minus the guys coming up behind you and dancing on your rear end.  I would go out more often if I could avoid the random pervs rubbing on me!  The icing on the cake was the next day when someone heard about where we went and called it the “trashiest bar in town!”

Another highlight of the week happened yesterday in my attempt to eat healthy.  I made a huge salad with every vegetable in the fridge.  While using the potato peeler for shredding carrots (you know for the fancy shredded carrots like in restaurants!), I totally peeled my finger.  I had to bandage it up to stop the bleeding and could finally get a good look at it today.  I had to numb it and trim away some of the skin.  I’m an idiot.

Next up, softball double-header this Friday and Tiger’s game on Saturday. 

I didn’t really spend the day at the beach, though you could’ve been fooled by the lady that showed up at my work in a bikini.  Not kidding.  A camoflauge bikini covered in only a net coverup.  All I could see was cleavage over the counter and I had to hide for a minute to regain composure.  Then I saw her take a seat in the waiting room…she was only wearing the bikini.  NO PANTS!  There were bikini bottoms fully exposed….well, they were slightly covered with fat rolls, but otherwise completely out in the open.  I felt like I was at Summer Jam (an all day country concert I went to when I was 17), except there was no beer tent to help me forget what I was seeing.

Another highlight of the day was the interview that took place.  Possibly a new vet?  I am left to think about this one for a while, since we won’t know officially for at least a week or two.  Of course it was a guy.  More testicles in the building…I don’t think we need that.  I think any man will get points just for being a man.  I just started climbing up the totem pole, I don’t want someone knocking me down!  A direct quote from a coworker, “he’ll automatically be liked because he can’t get pregnant.”  That is a bunch of crap.  I am not worth less just because I have ovaries.  Perhaps I should challenge him to a bench press contest.  Or a beer drinking contest.  Or a football knowledge contest.  Hmmm, I bet I could at least get 2 outta 3. 

The last time I blogged Pete was in California, and he is there again.  We are super excited that he keeps getting shipped across the country for work.  So, the last few days have been pretty lonely, but I’ve kept myself busy.  I am apparently the chosen one to do the grunt work for my 10 year reunion and I was finally able to get the invites out with my free time the last few days.  I still need about 15 addresses, but I am about over it.  I sent the names to all the other alumni that I have email for and if they don’t get the addresses then I say FUCK IT!  I’m tired of being the only one that does any work.  At least one classmate volunteered to have the reunion at her house, so she will be doing the other half of the work.  This better be worth it!!!

If it isn’t one thing it’s another!  I wasn’t able to get the reunion stuff done until now because I was helping get my brother in-law’s graduation party stuff done.  Last Tuesday (my day off) I painted my mother in-law’s bathroom, Friday after work I was cutting up veggies, then Saturday I was setting up and helping make food.  The party went well, but I’m glad it’s over!

Work has still been busy.  We just found out we are losing a few doctors, so I’m sure it’ll just get busier unless we find a new hire quickly.  I’ve been trying to be super doctor by using my message board for lots of consults.  The past few weeks I’ve been a dermatologist and an oncologist.  Giving 110% has gotten me a lot more requests, which means being even busier at work.  As one of the doctors at work says, “that’s the price of fame, baby!”  You can imagine how badly I want to punch him in the face when he says that to me while I’m running around and he is reading the newspaper! 

Luckily my good karma (probably from painting the bathroom!) was in play today.  I locked my keys in the car at the gas station when I stopped at the ATM.   I was parked next to a police officer who helped me get back in.  Apparently they are only supposed to do that if there is a baby in the car, but he accepted my groceries in the trunk argument (and my smile!) and helped me out.  I didn’t even have on any makeup…now I have to pay it forward somehow. 

Well, that’s all folks…

Today is my second day alone and I am BORED.  Pete left for California yesterday and won’t be back to Friday early in the AM.  Yesterday I was at SWF and Dilcos’ house for dinner and Cinco de Mayo Coronas, so I don’t know that yesterday really counts as being on my own.  I will say that I have done fairly well thus far…I have eaten chicken with salad for dinner instead of cereal or beer.  Though, I didn’t work today, so I guess the real test will be tomorrow night when I get home at 8 or 9 to an empty house (empty because I have to take Sam with me to work for a “bath” because I don’t know when I will actually be home). 

I did make it out to buy trees today…so in 2-3 weeks we will have 7 trees in the backyard!!!  Pretty exciting!  They will be 5 feet tall when they go into the ground.  That was about the end of my productivity today, since I woke up with a horrible sore throat courtesy of Kim (eh, I still love ya!). 

In other news, my 12-week New Mexico vacation diet started today.  We’ll see if it lasts.  And on that note, I’m out…

We made it through family party weekend!  We were able to get the house cleaned, make 3 different food items, set up the tables/move furniture in the living room in record time.  Of course the record time was required because I was late home on Friday after an emergency C-section, then we had to drive to K-zoo on Saturday for lunch and then help Jeff move some stuff from his old apartment.  Everything went smoothly…most of the extended family even showed up!!! 

Next up, Kim’s apartment hunting weekend, then Joe and Annie’s wedding, then I am up for my emergency weekend again.  We seem to be booked solid this month!  Crazy!!!

On this beautiful Monday (this tone is meant to be facetious) I feel it necessary to spew off a few random thoughts. 

-Shockingly enough, not everyone cares about your opinion…so shut up already!
-Being mad about something doesn’t make it go away, especially if you don’t speak up!  And if you can’t speak up, drink up because the anger has to go somewhere (reference to taxes, bills, construction, etc). 
-Being nice to people doesn’t always pay you back with kindness, sometimes it pays you back with an annoying person liking you.
-No matter how tired you get the dog on the weekend, she will always sleep it off when you are at work…then you are the only one tired on Monday night.
-People only comment on how you are doing at something if you are doing a bad job…no news is good news!
-I can only put up with as much shit as I do because I eat.  If I was a skinny bitch, I would be a crazy f-ing skinny BITCH!
-Lesbians are drawn to me…that is weird.
-When I was little I looked forward to being an adult.  I guess I didn’t know being an adult meant having to do a lot of things you don’t want to do in order to do a few of the things you do want to do. 
-As happy as I am that Spring is here,  the little chirping birds are driving me frickin crazy!

That’s all the ammunition I have for now.  I think I need to go have a beer…

My title may be a bit confusing.  I’ve actually been trying to blog for about 20 minutes and Sam keeps throwing her f-ing toys in my lap.  This last time I decided to just leave the mess she left behind after throwing her giant rope toy on my keyboard…it kind of helps describe the day I’ve had. 

I have been trying to do a better job at eating lately, but it is almost impossible to do so at my work.  This week I have walked by cookies in the hallway EVERY DAY.  There have been regular chips, BBQ chips, and chinese food.  Yesterday I sat in the breakroom for my lunch (turkey wrap with no cheese, yogurt, and veggies) while a cake was brought in.  The cake was set down about 2 feet away from me.  Then one by one, almost every employee came in to get a piece.  Each person would declare, “Oooh, it’s still warm!!!”  Then I would look over and see the cream cheese frosting dripping off each piece.  I did not have any cake.  But today when the doughnuts were dropped off I couldn’t take it anymore!!!  I ate a beautiful chocolate doughnut and afterwards I felt jittery and guilty.  That is the whole reason I avoid the sweets…I’m an IDIOT!

After listening to a lunchtime lecture on heartworm and heart failure (yes, a lecture during lunch…don’t get me started on that), I saw a heart failure dog.  This dog proceeded to panic attack itself into and episode of troubled breathing.  Then turned blue and collapsed.  Then it died and was resussitated, and died again, and was resussitated again.  Then just as I convinced the owner it was going to die for real, it started to improve and breathe much better.  As I was running up and down the hallway between appointments, phone calls to the owner, and the dog on oxygen, I was tripping over my boss’s son’s dog.  You know, you can’t play on the internet at dad’s work without bringing your dog there and keeping it in the hallway all afternoon.  AHHHHH!

Luckily, I got home to see there was guacomole and 2 Coronas in the fridge.  One more day till the weekend…

With my new car, I have a six month subscription to Sirius Radio.  At first I felt this was a frivolous expense…now I find this is a necessary evil for my driving experience.  No commercials.  All songs that play show up with title and artist on my console.  I am forever spoiled.  My favorite part is a radio show I catch on my drive home on early nights…The Ellis Show.  The host is Australian and curses like I do!  It is hilarious! 

I have finally found my niche at work.  High maintenance clients that pay their bills.  They are like me if I were a client.  They call me all the time to make sure all their questions are answered…they demand nothing but the best…and they PAY THEIR BILLS!!!  That is exactly like me at my doctor.  Except I appreciate these people…I think my doctor finds me to be a pain in the ass.  I think it is refreshing to have people that really care request me as their doctor. 

I am afraid that some of my good friends may be moving away.  First, Dilcos and SWF.  We will miss you dearly!  I wish we could talk you out of it, but I know it is a good opportunity, so I can only wish good luck.  Secondly, my good buddy Nora at work.  Nora is similar to me in my personality.  We both get grumpy when we are hungry and like to make fun of stupid people.  I love her sarcastic nature…it is very similar to my own.  I don’t know she is leaving for sure, but the thought of it makes me sad. 

Everything on the home front is going well, although I am not looking forward to painting the living room and kitchen walls/cabinets.  I originally scheduled this for Memorial Day Weekend, but I haven recently decided to push it back because I don’t want to.  I could think of another reason, but it would be a lie.  I’m just procrastinating because I’m lazy. 

 Well, on that note…I am out!